UK – Investigatory Powers Bill – Volunteer Targets

I saw a tweet earlier today that indicates the drafters of the UK Investigatory Powers Bill have fouled themselves, again.

Section 195, General Definitions (1) has a list of unnumbered definitions which includes:

“data” includes any information which is not data,

However creative the English courts may be, I think that passage is going to prove to be a real challenge.

Which makes even more worried than I was before.

A cleanly drafted bill that strips every citizen of the UK of their rights presents a well-defined target for opposition.

In this semantic morass, terms could mean what they say, the opposite and also be slang for a means of execution.

Because of the Paris bombings, there is a push on to approve something, anything, to be seen as taking steps against terrorism.

Instead of the Investigatory Powers Bill, Parliament should acquire 5 acres of land outside of London and erect a podium at its center. Members of Parliament will take turns reading Shakespeare aloud for two hours, eight hours a day, every day of the year.

Terrorists prefer high-value targets over low and so members of Parliament can save all the people of the UK from fearing terrorists attacks.

Their presence as targets will attract terrorists and simplify the task of locating potential terrorists.

Any member of parliament who is killed while reading Shakespeare at the designated location, should be posthumously made a peer of the realm.

A bill like that would protect the rights of every citizen of the UK, assist in the hunting of terrorist be drawing them to a common location and help prevent future crimes against the English language as are found in the Investigatory Powers Bill. What’s there not to like?

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